Can a marriage survive without sex: Introductory Remarks

Sexless marriages, though seldom discussed openly, are more widespread than you may expect.

In fact，Google searches for “sexless marriage” are three and a half times more frequent than “unhappy marriage” and eight times more common than “marriage without love,” which makes it the most-looked after marriage complaint.

But what exactly constitutes a sexless marriage?

According to some experts，a sexless marriage is when a couple has sex fewer than 10 times in one year. However, San Francisco-based sex therapist Danielle Harel defines it as any marriage in which the sex is “mostly non-existent between the couple.” This can range from not having sex in five years to only having it every couple of months.

But does a lack of sex mean there is no love in the marriage? Not necessarily. Love can exist without sexual intimacy, but it’s crucial to address the impact that the lack of physical connection can have on a relationship.

The reality is that the lack of sexual intimacy can put a strain on many marriages. It can lead to feelings of frustration，rejection, and resentment. It can also affect one’s self-esteem and overall happiness. However，it’s important to note that each couple’s situation is unique, and what works for one may not work for another.

So，can a marriage survive without sex？Expert opinions vary. Some believe that with open communication，emotional connection，and finding alternative ways to express intimacy, a marriage can thrive even without sexual activity.

Others argue that sexual compatibility is fundamental to a healthy relationship and that a lack of physical intimacy may lead to dissatisfaction and potential issues down the road.

Real-life examples show that some couples have managed to navigate through sexless marriages successfully. They have found ways to maintain their love and connection through emotional support, shared activities，and deepening their emotional bond.

In the next section, we will explore possible solutions for navigating a sexless marriage and discuss how to address the challenges that arise from the lack of sexual intimacy.

Is a marriage without sex sustainable？Let’s delve deeper to find answers.

The Reality of Sexless Marriages

Sexless marriages occur more frequently than expected, with a higher prevalence than unhappy or loveless marriages.

In fact, according to data scientist Seth Stephens-Davidowitz, searches for “sexless marriage” are three and a half times more common than “unhappy marriage” and eight times more common than “loveless marriage.”

So，what does it imply to be in a sexless marriage？While there’s no distinct definition，some experts believe a marriage is sexless when a couple has sex less than 10 times in one year.

San Francisco-based sex therapist Danielle Harel defines it as any marriage where the sex is “mostly non-existent between the couple.” This means that a sexless marriage could range from not having had sex in five years to only having it every few months.

The Reality of Sexless Marriages

• Sexless marriages occur more frequently than expected, with a higher prevalence than unhappy or loveless marriages.
• A sexless marriage is typically defined as having sex fewer than 10 times in one year or when sex is mostly non-existent between the couple.
• Approximately 19% of couples are in a sexless marriage，with some reporting no sexual contact for over a year.
• Mismatched libidos can cause a strain on a marriage，as one partner may have a higher sex drive than the other.
• Stress and unresolved conflicts can contribute to the lack of sexual intimacy in a marriage.

Research conducted in 2019 found that couples in happy marriages reported engaging in sexual intimacy one to three times per month. One of the primary causes of a sexless marriage is mismatched libidos, where one partner has a higher sex drive than the other. This can create tension and frustration for both individuals involved，as the higher libido partner may feel unsatisfied and unfulfilled.

Stress and unresolved conflicts can also contribute to the lack of sexual intimacy in a marriage.

Stress can lower testosterone levels and affect sex drive，while unresolved conflicts can lead to contempt and a lack of affection between partners.

Knowing the reasons is just the first step; let’s explore the impact of a sexless marriage on the individuals and the relationship next.

Impact of Lack of Sexual Intimacy on Marriages

A lack of sexual intimacy in a marriage can have far-reaching effects on the overall dynamics of the relationship. It’s important to understand the impact of a sexless marriage on both partners’ emotional well-being and the relationship as a whole.

For many men, the absence of regular sexual activity can lead to feelings of failure and inadequacy.

Men often associate their sexual prowess with their sense of self-worth, and when they are unable to engage in sex with their partner，they may question their desirability or believe that they are not satisfying their partner’s needs.

Furthermore，the emotional disconnection that arises from a sexless marriage can be detrimental to the relationship. Without physical intimacy, couples may feel disconnected from one another，leading to feelings of loneliness and isolation. In some cases，this emotional void may drive individuals to seek fulfillment outside the marriage, potentially leading to infidelity.

The impact of a sexless marriage is not limited to emotional consequences alone; it can also have a significant impact on mental health. The feeling of inadequacy and the inability to meet one’s partner’s sexual needs can take a toll on a person’s mental well-being. This can contribute to feelings of unhappiness, bitterness，and even depression.

Moreover，unresolved conflicts within the marriage can contribute to a lack of sexual intimacy.

When arguments and disagreements go unresolved, it creates a buildup of resentment and diminishes affection between partners. This breakdown in communication can extend to the bedroom and further exacerbate the lack of physical intimacy.

The impact can be profound, but does this mean the end of marriage? Let’s see what experts say.

Can a Marriage Survive Without Sex: Expert Opinions

Whether a marriage can survive without sex is a complex one that elicits diverse opinions from experts in the field.

While some argue that open communication，emotional connection, and alternative expressions of intimacy can sustain a relationship without sexual activity, others emphasize the importance of sexual compatibility for a healthy partnership. So，what do real-life examples reveal about the viability of sexless marriages?

Experts have their say, but what do real-life examples suggest？

Let’s find out.

In the realm of sexless marriages, it’s important to acknowledge that each couple’s experience is unique. One example is Robert and Molly，who had been married for several years when their sex life dwindled to near non-existence.

Despite Molly’s attempts to address the issue and seek professional help，Robert refused to acknowledge or discuss their lack of intimacy. This refusal to confront the problem ultimately led Molly to file for divorce, highlighting the detrimental impact a sexless marriage can have on one’s overall well-being.

However，not all couples facing a lack of sexual intimacy experience the same outcome. Some individuals have found ways to navigate and even thrive in a sexless marriage. They prioritize emotional support, shared activities，and deepening their emotional bond as alternative avenues for maintaining love and connection.

While expert opinions may vary on whether a marriage can survive without sex，real-life examples demonstrate that it is possible under certain circumstances.

Couples who still love each other and are willing to find non-sexual ways to express affection can sustain their relationship without resorting to infidelity or seeking divorce. However，it is crucial to address any underlying unhealthy relationship dynamics and assess the impact on one’s overall quality of life.

Intriguingly, the decision to stay in a sexless marriage lies solely with the individuals involved. If both partners are content with a lack of sexual intimacy due to low libido or being asexual, they may be able to maintain a fulfilling partnership. Joining a support forum for individuals in sexless marriages can also provide valuable insights and guidance.

Experts may offer their insights，but real-life examples shed light on the complexities of sexless marriages.

In the next section，we will explore captivating stories of individuals navigating the challenges of a sexless marriage and discover the possible solutions they have found. Stay tuned to uncover the realities and possibilities of sustaining a marriage without sex.

Real-life Examples of Sexless Marriages

Sexless marriages are not just a theoretical concept; they exist in real life and can pose significant challenges to couples.

Here are a few real-life examples of sexless marriages:

• Robert and Molly had been married for a few years and their sex life had become abysmal. Robert refused to discuss it or go to therapy，which made it worse. Molly eventually filed for divorce.
• Bill’s sexless marriage came as a result of his affair with a coworker. His wife Annie was unable to forgive him，leading to a downward spiral in their sex life and culminating in a separation.
• Some couples may be perfectly at peace with having sex once every few months, while for others，engaging sexually once or twice a month may seem inadequate to one or both partners.
• According to a survey carried out in 2018，one in four couples in the US is in a sexless relationship. 15% of all marriages in the US are also reported to be sexless.
• In case you and your partner have reached an impasse over individual sexual interests，it could be a sign that you need to move on from the sexless marriage.

These stories present hope, but what can you do if you find yourself in a sexless marriage？

Let’s discuss some solutions next.

Navigating a Sexless Marriage: Possible Solutions

Navigating a sexless marriage can be a challenging and complex journey, but it’s not impossible to find solutions and maintain a fulfilling relationship.

Communication is key when it comes to addressing the lack of intimacy. Having an open and honest conversation with your partner about the change in your sex life is crucial. Try to understand each other’s perspectives and work together to identify the root causes of the problem.

If therapy hasn’t yielded positive results or if your partner is unwilling to seek help, it may be a red flag indicating deeper intimacy issues. In such cases，walking away from the marriage might be the best option for your overall well-being.

However，if you decide to stay，it’s essential to manage your expectations and find alternative ways to connect emotionally and physically. Explore different forms of physical touch that can still be pleasurable and intimate. Remember, a marriage without sex doesn’t mean there is no love or connection between partners.

The journey in a sexless marriage can be complex，but with understanding and effort, it’s possible to navigate it successfully.

In the next section，we will discuss what you can do if you’re unhappy in a sexless marriage and explore potential paths towards resolution.

Wrapping Up: Can a Marriage Survive Without Sex?

While the impact of a sexless marriage can be significant，it is worth noting that each marriage is unique，and what works for one couple may not work for another.

One potential effect of a sexless marriage on a husband is the feeling of inadequacy, as he may believe he is unable to please his partner. This can lead to a reluctance to discuss the issue or seek help，further exacerbating the problem.

Therapy may not always provide a breakthrough in addressing the lack of sexual intimacy，indicating that the issues may be beyond resolution.

Separate bedrooms and a sense of loneliness can also contribute to the challenges of a sexless marriage.

Ultimately, whether a marriage can survive without sex depends on various factors，including the individuals involved and their ability to find alternative means of expressing love and affection.

It is possible for some couples to thrive in a sexless marriage by prioritizing emotional support，shared activities，and deepening their emotional bond. However，if unresolved sexual differences or lack of intimacy begins to negatively impact one’s quality of life, seeking divorce may be a justifiable choice.

Remember，seeking support from professionals and joining support forums can provide valuable guidance in navigating these complex situations.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does a sexless marriage mean no love?

Sexless marriages don’t necessarily mean a lack of love. Love and sex are not always synonymous.

While sexual intimacy is an important aspect of many relationships, it’s possible to survive a sexless marriage by expressing love through non-sexual gestures and finding other means to connect on a deeper level. Seeking divorce over a sexless marriage is justified if it negatively impacts overall quality of life.

What can I do if I’m unhappy in a sexless marriage?

If you find yourself unhappy in a sexless marriage，it’s essential to take action. Open and honest communication with your partner is crucial to address the issue.

However，if therapy hasn’t yielded positive results or your partner is unwilling to seek help, it may be an indication that deeper intimacy issues exist. In such cases，it might be necessary to consider walking away from the marriage for your overall well-being.